Soon

This is andy. Andy didn't have a good year this year. It was boring, but more importantly it was lame. Andy hates being boring, but if there is one thing he can not stand it is lame things. He refuses to allow this to continue.

He just....doesn't know what to do....

Ignorance

That is Andy. He is very boring. Andy thinks it is time for change. Gosh darn it, Andy is going to do something about it!

Andy walked 15 feet to the right. But hey, it was something. Andy is on a roll now. He's doing stuff! This is quite the accomplishment for him. No point in stopping now. Some quick thinking leads to him closing his eyes really tight, which he never does.

It gets dark and Andy can't see anything. He waits a few seconds then opens his eyes.

Wait....what?

Resurrection

This is Andy. Andy has been gone for quite some time. With a certain holiday coming soon Andy feels the need to always be prepared. So every year Andy takes precautions a few months before Halloween. He does this in secrecy but in reality nobody wants his secret methods. Nobody even knows who he is, let alone that he exists.

As a kid, Andy saw a zombie movie. He wasn't frightened by it, but fascinated. From that point on he has spent every Halloween waiting for the zombie apocalypse to come. Not because he wants the world to end, but because he sets up a zombie trap every year. Now don't be confused, it's not some elaborate contraption. And it is also the same thing every year.



Andy has a really good feeling about this year.

Time

This is Andy. Andy is deep in thought. Time has always fascinated Andy. Time isn't linear, we as humans only perceive it that way. If we try to comprehend it any further than that our minds will mostly implode.

Andy doesn't have to worry about that. He has spent his life thinking about things so anything he thinks about he will tackle with ease. He is so damn boring his mind has spent every waking moment processing information. He could be the smartest person in the world, but he is the most boring person in the world. Andy could solve almost any problem because all he has done his whole life is think. He could probably tackle the mystery of time if he spent enough time thinking about it.

But alas, he just gives it a glancing thought and goes back to his other thoughts. And by other thoughts i mean the blank slate that he calls his mind.

Andy is smarter than you, accept it.

Shoes

That is Andy. Andy needs new shoes. His current pair of shoes just isn't comfortable anymore. The sad thing is, new shoes would be an exciting time in his life. Not like everyone else who only get slightly excited about new shoes (some people don't get excited at all!) For Andy, it's like a life changing experience.

Andy might have had enough money for a nice new pair of shoes....

If it wasn't for that fucking toaster.

Holes

This is Andy. Wait.....no it's not. That is a hole. To be specific, that is the hole that Andy fell into

Andy was bored of just standing there, so he decided to walk around. In Andy's spur of the moment decision he failed to realize there was a hole in front of him.

So Andy fell down the hole and now he can't get out

His foot itches, like REALLY bad.

Television

This is Andy. Andy found a TV. Nobody was around so Andy decided to hang out around it. It's not plugged in. There are no outlets in sight. It seems like it's one of those old console TVs. Andy doubts it will even work.

This kind of technology is new to Andy. He has never watched TV in his life. Andy has absolutely no idea what to do with it.

5$ that 10 years from now it will be a fashion statement.

Fatality

This is Andy. Andy is bleeding. It seems that Andy's organs have suffered a severe trauma and as a result he is bleeding internally. How the blood is seeping out from his insides is quite a mystery. Andy once read a book about this sort of thing. "If one suffers a sever trauma to the abdomen, internal bleeding can and will most likely occur. In such a case one should seek immediate medical attention." That did seem to be the case. Maybe the blood is coming out because it is a hot day and he is sweating a lot. The blood could be escaping through the pours on his torso.

Andy should probably get a second opinion.

Images

This is Andy. Andy is incredibly boring. Something has been happening to Andy the past few days. Andy has been seeing.....things. He knows they are not there, but he hopes they aren't all in his head.

The things Andy has been seeing makes a cold shiver run up his spine. Horrid pictures of a terrible scene keep popping up. He can't make them go away. What's weird is it's the same image, it just keeps coming and coming. It won't stop. Andy doesn't know how to stop it. He fears it will never stop.

Resistance is futile.

Toaster

This is Andy. Andy recently bought a toaster. Having no job or source of income it was tough raising the funds needed for this toaster. For his entire life he has been saving up by collecting spare change he finds on the ground. He spent every penny he had and now he has this happy little toaster.

Andy forgot to buy bread.

Clouds

This is Andy. Those are clouds. Clouds have a tendency to block the sun and create shade. Clouds are also notorious for raining on things. These clouds are not doing either of those things. They are just chillin in the sky, being boring just like Andy there. The major difference is that Andy is standing on the ground and the clouds are floating in the sky.

At least the clouds have each other.

Perception

This is Andy. To be specific, this is Andy two weeks ago. Andy spends his time thinking. If something is in the immediate area he will think about that thing. Otherwise he just thinks about how boring his life is. He doesn't really like being boring. But Andy has never really enjoyed anything else so he assumes that being boring is his true calling. One day while Andy was thinking something out of the ordinary happened.

It seemed as if Andy's universe was being recreated right in front of him. Well, right above him if you want to get technical. Andy was.....scared....he doesn't know if he was dreaming or not. Andy doesn't usually have dreams like this so he tries to rule it out. But this situation being a dream is the only reason he can come up with. Why else would this happen?

Andy doesn't sleep anymore.

Cliffs

This is Andy. He's on the edge of a cliff. Looking down he can not see anything. It slowly turns to fogs a long ways down making the bottom of the chasm un-see-able. Andy is not suicidal, but the thought of jumping just to see what is at the bottom crosses his mind.

That thought lingers for a bit, then Andy decides to turn and walk away. He looks in the opposite direction and is greeted with a scary sight.

Maybe there's a really fat person at the bottom that will break his fall.

Popsicles

This is Andy. He found a popsicle. Where it came from or who made it is unkown. He doesn't even know what flavor it is. It is purple-ish so it might be grape, but he isn't going to lick it to find out. He found the damn thing, Who knows what it really is. But he gets an idea. If you plant an apple seed, an apple tree grows. So if you plant a popsicle a popsicle tree will grow. Or at least some sort of popsicle plant.

He plants the popsicle and for the next few months he comes back to the plot of dirt where he planted it and checks to see if anything grew. It gives him something to do. Something to look forward to, otherwise he would just stand around doing nothing.

Months pass with no results. Andy thinks to himself "Popsicles are man made. There is nothing natural about them" and realizes that this whole situation is silly. He came back to the plot of dirt one last time to say goodbye. He still doesn't know what flavor it was. Guess he'll never know now. He parts ways with it and never comes back

It was probably blueberry.

Recognition

This is Andy. He is waving. You can see him. You see everything that happens to him. But he can't see you. Your life is so much more interesting than his. He wishes he could see something or someone. But he doesn't see any of that. All he sees is the open field he is standing in. And the bleak horizon that is the same thing as the one behind him. You may think he is waving at you. But he isn't. He's just waving because he thinks it's better than just standing there with his arms at his sides. Is it sad that he is so boring, simply waving his arm is more exciting than anything he ever does?

Andy doesn't even know you're there

Party

That is Andy. Normally Andy stands around all day and does nothing. Just stands there, incredibly bored of his boring life. Today he thought he wouldn't be so boring. Andy decided to sit down a few feet in front of his normal standing spot. Little did Andy know, in the exact spot he used to stand, a piece of paper that was carried by the wind landed right where he normally stands. But since he is sitting down he did not see it.

What a perfect opportunity for Andy to get off his ass and actually do something. He could've gone to the party, made friends, had fun. But Andy is not where he normally is. In an attempt to be less boring, he made it so that he would continue to be boring.



A slight wind picks up and blows the paper away. Far away.



Andy got a cold from the breeze.

Data

This is Andy. He is thinking. What he is thinking about is very boring. Andy is thinking about himself thinking. Just standing there. And thinking. Nothing more. Having nothing better to do, He stands there and thinks. He can't think of anything interesting to think about so he thinks about him thinking. Hoping that the never ending cycle of him thinking about him thinking will spiral into an infinite "Thinking about me thinking, about me thinking, about me thinking... etc. etc." So there he stands. Thinking.

The little guy in his thought bubble is actually thinking about how to get out of the thought bubble, it's boring as hell in there. The closest thing Andy had to a friend thinks he is boring. His thoughts are all he really has, but they are just as boring as him.

Think about that.

Uncertainty

This is Andy. He is boring. He enjoys doing boring things. He doesn't know how to do anything else. Being boring is just how he is. It's how he always has been and he thinks it's how he always will be. So there Andy goes, staring into the sky wondering to himself if this is some sort of game. Why is he so boring? Why can't he have an eventful life? What made him this way? It all seems like some game is being played and he is losing. Either that or it's an extremely long and tedious game that no one wins and everyone wants to stop playing after the first round but for some weird reason they keep playing. Maybe in that situation it is all a game too. A game being made of those playing a game. As Andy's thoughts start to spiral into the never ending possibilities of that thought train, Something very strange happens.

A mysterious poof comes out of nowhere and grabs Andy's attention. It takes a little while but the smoke clears away and reveals what has just been poofed.

It's a fish.

Some games just aren't fun.

Industry

This is Andy. He is admiring this building. Andy lives in a place where there is little to no human structures. Barely any wildlife to appreciate. Sometimes he hopes for aliens to swoop down and leave a trace of their other-worldly society. Andy didn't really care what it was, as long as it was something. Now this building mysteriously appeared in his neck of the woods and he can't help but stare at it. He does not try to enter it. He does not try to get the attention of whoever may be inside. He has come to look at this building for the past 2 weeks. For such a boring individual, he is not bored of it. His boring life has been turned around by this mysterious building. He has so many questions that are unanswered about it, but that gives him something to think about.

One day while he is looking at the building he hears a rumbling sound coming from behind him. Andy ignores it. It gets louder and louder with each passing second. He reluctantly turns around and see what all the ruckus is about.

Andy ran away and didn't look back.